In re-creating my website, I’ve had to confront visibility and the fears I have about it. It is one of the big fears that comes with writing books, with sharing our stories. Visibility equates with vulnerability, that feeling of “taking off the robe” as I call it. Revealing myself can feel like getting naked in front of a crowd that I’m not sure will approve. Does it feel like that to you?
I decided that it’s worth it to me to get real. What’s the best that could happen? For me, the best is that the people I most want to help see themselves in my story. The best means that someone who’s been holding their own story back is inspired to share it to inspire others. Together, we help raise the positive vibration of the planet.
Greater visibility helps us attract our soulmate circle. How else are people going to find us, to be attracted to us and to our work?
How can we support them unless we’re visible?
When I ask the leaders I work with what they want to learn, they often say, “Marketing. I need to get better at that!” While we have the best intentions to do better, our reluctance comes from an uneasiness with being more visible, more “out there” with our ideas, our opinions, and our stories.
Let’s acknowledge that visibility wasn’t always a good thing for us as kids, whether it was fear of attracting the attention of a bully or a strict teacher, or a parent who wasn’t ready to deal with our noisy imaginations.
You may have received some negative feedback about being too loud, too energetic, or too creative (like getting artistic with crayons on the walls). Being noticed could be scary! Over time, you learned to be quieter, less noticeable. You learned to navigate life, keeping more secrets and a lower profile.
We can give a lot of power to the fear of being “exposed.” In business, it’s easy to hide behind our products, our services, our websites, and even our books. We say only what we think people want to hear or what we’re comfortable with, afraid of What happens if I’m more visible? What if I attract attention that I don’t want? What if I get negative reviews? Why do I have to talk about me when all I want to do is help other people?
How do we calm those fears and questions? How do we turn that energy around to blossom into being visible so our soulmate circles can connect with us?
- Be Creative
I’ve found my voice in being creative. To express myself through something fun takes the fear out of it. For example, I love bright clothing, dancing, and music. I love to sing. My dad was a professional musician and singer, and he taught me how to project without a microphone into a large room, so I can be (very) loud, and sometimes that feels so good. The caveat is that I do all this big, bold stuff in private! But that private creativity gives me the confidence to share my voice publicly through writing and speaking. What is your way of expressing yourself boldly in your own way?
Try moving or dancing or create something in a big and expansive way that feels fun. Then you can bring that energy into a more public expression (articles, videos, podcasts, art, etc.) that helps you meet the people you want to serve.
- Know Your Audience
The people who most need your message, the people you created it for, make up your soulmate circle. Those people know instantly that your message is for them because they can sense your authenticity, the light you shine. It’s attractive; magnetic. Focus on your soulmate tribe and only them. Why focus your energy on anyone else? These are the people who need your unique perspective. Your focus on them helps you serve them better.
- Give Them What They Need Most
The people who most need your message also need to know your story. Why? So they know that you’re the real deal, that you’ve been where they are now and have something they need. You are their person. You reach them with what feels like a lifeline. True visibility is connecting with and impacting that person you know is part of your circle. When you hear, “I’m so grateful I found you. You’re exactly what I was looking for,” that makes visibility and overcoming your fears so worth it.
Move from fear to visibility in a way that makes sense to you and to the people you share your story and your life with. How can you start today to share something about you that can help someone else?
~Amy Collette believes in a world where thought leaders foster
deep human connection and lasting impact by sharing their inspirational stories.